Who Do Young People Turn to for Advice?

Adolescence is a time of massive change physically, emotionally, and socially. As teenagers begin to carve out their identity and independence, many parents and carers find themselves wondering: Where do I fit into all of this? 

It’s completely normal to feel a little out of the loop as your teen starts to turn more toward their friends or even the internet for advice. But research shows that your role is still incredibly important, and understanding how and why young people seek help can help you stay connected, informed, and supportive in the moments that matter most.

What the Research Tells Us

According to an Australian Institute of Family Studies (AIFS) report, the vast majority of adolescents look to their friends and parents when facing everyday personal and emotional challenges well before turning to a health professional.

Here’s what the numbers say about who 14- to 15-year-olds turn to for help:

• 74% sought help from a friend
• 69% sought help from a parent
• 25% went to a teacher
• 20% looked for help on the internet
• 9% saw a mental health professional
• 6% sought support from a doctor
• Only 2% reached out to a helpline

These figures are powerful. They show just how important everyday relationships are in a young person’s life and why the role of parents and carers remains central, even if it feels like you’re being replaced by a smartphone or a best mate.

Why Teens Turn to Peers First

During the early teen years, friendships take centre stage. Teens talk more with their friends than ever before, and these relationships can become intense, deeply personal, and incredibly supportive.

Friendships in adolescence are usually grounded in similarity, shared experiences, and a strong sense of acceptance. 

This shift isn’t something to fear, as it’s part of the natural journey toward independence. When friendships are positive, they help build confidence, teach empathy, and create a sense of belonging. 

Peer influence isn’t always a bad thing. Teens can be inspired by their friends to be more adventurous in healthy ways, like speaking up for themselves or exploring new hobbies that build self-esteem and a sense of community.

The Online World

It’s no surprise that around 1 in 5 teens reported turning to the internet for advice. Whether it’s TikTok videos, Reddit forums, or mental health websites, young people today have a world of information at their fingertips.

This highlights the importance of digital literacy and having open conversations about what they’re reading and watching online. Encouraging your teen to critically assess what they find (and reminding them that not everything online is accurate or healthy) can be a good way to support them without coming across as controlling.

Social media and messaging apps allow teenagers to maintain friendships in new ways. While this online connection can sometimes feel like a barrier to real-world conversation, it’s often just an extension of their in-person relationships.

While it might feel like your teen is glued to their phone, they’re often using it to connect with people who are important to them, and that’s not inherently a bad thing.

When Teens Do Seek Professional Help

The AIFS study also found that adolescents experiencing mental health issues were more likely to seek support from health professionals and non-face-to-face sources (like websites and helplines). This suggests that when teens do reach out for professional help, it’s often because their needs are more serious and potentially more urgent.

As a parent or carer, being aware of the signs of mental health challenges and gently encouraging professional support when needed can make a world of difference.

It’s a Team Effort

Supporting your teen’s mental health and development isn’t something you have to do alone. In fact, helping them build a broad support network that includes peers, mentors, extended family, and professionals is one of the best things you can do.

Think of it as a team approach. You don’t have to be the only one they turn to, but your presence, support, and consistency matter more than you might realise.

Final Thoughts

Teenagers are learning how to make sense of the world and their place in it. They need people who listen without judgement, offer guidance without control, and give them space to grow while staying connected.

As a parent or carer, your relationship may change, but your value doesn’t. You’re still one of their most important anchors. And when they know you’re there for them, they’re far more likely to turn to you when it matters most.